Half asleep, irritated....let's write a blog and see what happens
What you are reading is not what I originally planned for this blog. Before I began typing this, I typed a completely different blog, but deleted it because it would have gone over your heads. In case you don't believe me here are a few topics I covered in said blog:
Top Secret, government funded experiments
Apple (the company, not the food)
...and Henry Zinkerman.
If you're thinking of Googling Henry Zinkerman, don't bother. He doesn't exist. THAT'S how crazy this blog was.
My left foot has a mind of it's own. It's definitely the black sheep of my body. It all started when I was 12 and my sister ran over my left foot with a vacuum cleaner. In that moment I felt a pain I had never felt before and my first thought (I'm not kidding about this) was, "This foot will NEVER be the same again!"
I was right.
I've given up on my left-pinky toe. One might say that I've disowned it, but I don't want to lose it. I love it from a distance. I let it sleep on the couch, rent free, however, I do hassle the son of a bitch for grocery money.
My left-big toe is just over weight and needs to get off it's lazy ass and get a job.
My left-middle toe is alright. It's the only part of my left foot that displays some form of responsibility. It washes the dishes. It's good with the kids. It has dreams. If you were to ask me, I'd say, "Yes, my left middle toe is going places."
Speaking of going places, my parents called and said they're going to Las Vegas for a week. If you knew my parents, then you'd know how ridiculous this is. What are John Q. (that's what I call my dad) and my mom going to do in "Sin City"?
I spent a week in Las Vegas once (best vacation ever) and I do not think they can handle the sea of pornography flyers littered about the streets.
I should really stop writing this and go to sleep. That's what a responsible person would do. That's what my left-middle toe would do if it were me. As a matter of fact, that's what's going to happen. This is a stupid blog post, anyways.
Oh, and I didn't know what pictures would go with such a ridiculous post, so I googled "Ninja Fight" and what you see was one of the first results.