Q.Ledbetter is visited by THE HAWK!
Me being the Hungry Harry that I am, during my lunch break I deciede to go to Subway which is right across from my building. As I left I noticed a crowd of people standing around, staring at something in the corner that was blocked off by yellow 'CAUTION' tape.
*Think: The party scene in the movie Eyes Wide Shut where the creepy, masked old men are "watching the festivities".
Me being the Lookie Louie that I am I decided to stroll over and see what all the hub-bub was about. Imagin my surprise when I saw a HUGE hawk standing beind the caution tape in attack mode. Its wings were spread out, its feathers were ruffled, its beak was open, and a fire was in its eyes as if to say, "Bring it bi--ches. Bring it all you can!"
Me being the Journalistic Julius that I am, I snapped a few photos, called best bud/roommate, Ryan Conner to share my experience (immediately after dialing I realized how insignificant this story would be to him...and problaby everyone reading this bulletin), and kept on my way.
Me being the Imaginative Ira that I am, I began playing out different scenarios in my head as to how the experience could have gone:
What if the hawk attacked me?
What if the hawk SPOKE to me?
What would it say?
What would I say back?
What do you say to a hawk?
Who would believe me if I told them I spoke to a hawk today?
What if the hawk turned out to be a Phoenix?
What if the Phoenix turned into ashes and rebirthed before my eyes?
What if I were a hawk?
What if I were THE PHOENIX?!
After such pondering I decided that hawks would be much cooler if we referred to them as The Hawk. Even this story would be more interesting if I referred to the hawk as The Hawk:
So instead of, "A hawk was outside of my building today during lunch," I'd say, "THE HAWK was outside of my building today. I took a picture with it."
"The Phoenix was outside of my building at work today during lunch time. It was glorious."
wow....ok....I have to go before this gets any dumber.
But, for the record: The hawk was outside of my building today and there really was police tape around it; and it really was in attack mode....sitting perfectly still, too. It was impressive to say the least.
NOTE: I'm not sure if it was a hawk or an eagle. I can't tell the difference.