put some stank on your desire....
So, last night I went out with a friend to the Improv Comedy Club in DC. This friend is a female. I met her at a decided location and on my way to said location I made an additional decision to make myself appear to be more suave than I actually am. The first step in making myself appear more suave is to make an attempt to smell good for a change.
I keep 4 viles of smell good oils in my car. I didn't know which one to pick or which one the woman I was about to meet up with would enjoy the most, so I chose the one that sounded the best. My choices were:
4) *untitled oil*
Which one would you go for? Thats right....DESIRE! I open the cap to begin application. The tip of the oil is set up so that you roll on the oil. When I began applying the oil the roll on must have malfunctioned because it spilled all over my arm. There was an excess of Desire on my arm. I paniced and rubbed the excess oil all over my clothes, neck, forearms, etc.
By the time I got to the rondevu location, my whole car and my entire person was covered in Desire. I was going to get out of the car for a hug, but that was out of the question. I decided to stay in the car and avoid the hug for her own benefit. She got into my car and before even saying 'hello', I said, "I should explain to you why I reek of Desire." I figured this would be a funny way of introducing the explaination of why I (at the time) seemed like one of those assholes that piles on smelly goods and wears shades indoors. I'm not the type of guy to do either one of those things 'cause I'm not an effin' prick.
NOTE: Seriously, if you wear shades indoors or after sun down....shame.
The comedy show was great. If ya' missed it, ya' missed it.
On the way home I called my friend Ashely. It was after midnight. I didn't realize this until her phone started ringing. I was like, "Oh CRAPOLA! Its after 12:00! Ashe is probably asleep!" She picked up, sensed that I was a bit lonely, and obliged conversation until I got home. This is why Ashley is cooler than the rest of the world.
When I got home my two housemates and a house friend Kaddi Seems (I only know him by his rap name) were engaging in typical guy behavior. They were all in the living room. Ike was parading about with his shirt off and doing push ups and Risi and Kaddi were discussing athletic stats and players. All of this was happening while they were watching "da game" on TNT.
Most of you don't know that I'm not like 99% of the other men in this country/world. Usually walking into this scene would prompt an immediate removal of my presence since I know NOTHING (and I mean NOTHING) about sports and the thought of working out or taking my shirt off around humans gives me the willies; but I stayed. I thought to myself, "Let me pretend to be a normal guy for once." Every now and then I'd chime into Risi and Kaddi's conversation with, "THAT GUY SUCKS, DUDE!"
NOTE: If you say that at any point during a conversation that is centered around sports, it'll fit. I proved that to myself last night.
I even challeged Ike to a push up contest. He didn't even bother engaging in said contest. He must be afraid. Either that or he didn't want to embarass me :p
....after that I went to bed....