get it guuuuurl!!!!!
Who remembers Captain Cave Man? Hannah Barberra cartoons were the best.
My tie is crooked in the picture I took for my ID badge for work. I don't even like that tie. Why did I wear it? I'm cooky.
Last night I went to Soho (coffee hut in DC). Soho is in DuPont Circle. If you are from DC, then you know the demographic of the people that live there. For those of you who don't know I'll explain as simply as possible.....its a gay town. 90% of the people that live there are gay.
Now this isn't a problem for me. I can count two good male friends of mine who are gay and don't know it yet; either that or they think they're fooling me (seriously). In any case, Q.Ledbetter has no problem with gay folks....but last night I came across a guy that I have an issue with. I have an issue with anyone who purposely goes extreme with their personality. I have an issue with anyone of any gender or race or preference who tries their very best to be as much of that gender, race, or preference as can be as opposed to being themselves and allowing their culture to shine naturally. A perfect example of this would be Carlos Mancea, who tries his very best to be as Mexican as possible.
INTERESTING SIDE NOTE: Carlos Mancea isn't even his real name and he's not even Mexican. He's half Indian and half German. Also, he steals all his stand up material, so he's not even a real comedian either.
Anywhoo, last night there was a guy who walked in to the coffee shop with dutty ('dirty' would be inappropriate) dreads that were neatly pressed and crumped in sequence with a sky blue flannel shirt (didn't even know they made those), skin tight blue jeans, and white dress shoes....like gators, man. Also he had white aviator shades on with matching bracelets.
When he walked in he looked around for a second and clearly mistook Soho, the modest DC coffee shop for a runway extravaganza. I swear he walked across the room as if he was participating in an exercise for America's Top Model. You know...like the little assignments that Tyra sends them out on...one of those stupid ones where she'd say something like:
"A model is a model wherever she goes. She reeks of modelesque swagger. I want you to go to a coffee shop in Washington, DC and really work that room! I want you to walk right into that coffee shop and turn some heads guuurrlz."
NOTE: 'Girls' was mispelled on purpose to really drive that one home.
Anyways, he loudly and flammingly ordered his coffee and went outside and had a loud flamming conversation about how "Dat bitch think she alla dat". This guy sounded like a woman. If I closed my eyes and listened to him, then I may have been attracted. A conversation with this guy would be like this:
ME: Hey, how you doin'?
HIM: YES, I AM GAY! SO WHAT?! DON'T YOU JUDGE ME!
HIM: I seen the way you be lookin' at me, bitch! Don't hate! Don't hate!
ME: Hate? I don't hate you?
HIM: Yuh Huh! You all up in my grill 'cause my lip gloss is poppin'!
ME: Well, you're lip gloss is cool.
HIM: All da boyz like it, so they chase me after school.
NOTE: If you haven't heard the song, Lip Gloss then you don't understand the humor in the last few lines of that imaginary conversation. Let me say this: That song is the funniest thing you'll ever hear in your entire life. You go download it.
....you go download it right now.