A Letter for Q.Ledbetter from The Body
As of 5am October 2nd, 2007 we, The Body, are going on strike. You will notice when you wake up that we have shut down production of all energy and will leave you with a very weary and nauseous feeling in your stomach. You may also notice that symptoms of mud butt are in full effect.
We have initiated this strike because of last night's mistreatment. We, The Body, are tired of your antics, Q.Ledbetter! What were you thinking when you decided to go running last night?! We did NOT appreciate you exercising so soon after being sick all weekend. You're kind of an idiot, Q.Ledbetter.
What were you thinking when you took that Multi Vitamin right before bed?! Sure you could've taken it when you ate your delicious Boston Market dinner early in the evening, but you did not. You waited until the food had already began digesting in the stomach and then you hit us with the vitamin. We know that you have read the directions and the casing clearly states that vitamins must be taken WITH meals; not 2-3 hours after them.
As a result of your stupidity, by the time you read this we, The Body, will be on strike! You will toss and turn all night and you will wake up with wobbly legs and hot flashes. You will be aching in your torso. You will be dizzy and of course, you will have symptoms of mud butt.
The Body, in association with the 36 Chambers of the Union of Affairs.
P.S. - Drink water, bitch.